Sonic's HOUSE PARTY
by LASTKNOWSOLDIER22
Summary: Sonic goes throughs stuff like a pink stalker as he prepares for a house party in the next two days . Not good at these summaries. Rated M for language and some adult stuff in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1: The Start

_**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Sonic The Hedgehog Characters **_

_**WASSUP! Second Fanfic. Decided to do one about a party. Enjoy.**_

**CHAPTER 1: Lazy Ass**

_Sonic's House. Tuesday afternoon. 7:00pm_

"Open the door here….."

"No, you open it you have more points."

"But I need the box. I have shitty guns."

"A MP5K and Galil aren't Shitty Shadow-"

"OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR.."

Here sat Sonic the Hedgehog and Shadow the Hedgehog, arguing on who's going to open the next door to the box in a game of Zombies. They kept on exchanging words, not even noticing that the zombies jumped them. As they continued cursing each other, Tails a entered the room.

"Guys. Guys, what the hell are you two yapping about, jeeze it's like an episode of Jersey Shore here." The fox bitched

"Well faker here was being selfish about opening this damn do-"Shadow noticed the game restarted. "MOTHERFUCKER SONIC, LOOK WHAT HAPPENED BECAUSE OF YOU, NOW WE HAVE TO DO THIS ALL OVER AGAIN!."

"Dude, calm the fuck down, it's just a game." Sonic said calmly.

"FUCK YOU," The Black hedgehog got up and threw his controller across the room, breaking it into pieces. Sonic stood up, a serious look on his face.

"You know you know me an extra controller you twat." Shadow gave him the bird and stormed out of the house. A neighbor stared at Shadow. "WHAT THE FUCK YOU LOOKING AT, RETARD?" Shadow roared at the neighbor. He walked forward to him to feel the wrath of the ultimate lifeform, which was a powerful kick to the balls. The poor man cuffed his privates, crying in pain. Sonic and Tails looked on as the enraged black hedgehog kicked the shit out of innocent pedestrians.

"Talk about a rage quit." Tails snickered looking down the street. Sonic sat on the porch, rubbing his head. "Christ, now I have to buy an extra, shit. Tails, good friend, can you run over to Best Buy and-"

"And pay Fifty bucks on another controller, screw you. Since we'd killed Eggman, you have been here all this time doing nothing but playing Black Ops with Shadow. You should do something more productive.."

"Like killing more zombies…?"

"NO DUMBASS, I mean like go for a run, walk around, hang out, you know that type of shit."

"I do hang out with friends," Sonic defended as they walked back in the house

"Shadow and PSN users don't count" Tails countered. Then, something totally random happened. _CRASH! _Sonic heard it coming from the living room. "What the hell was that?" They ran into the room. A window had been busted to pieces. The cause: a rock...with a note. Sonic picked up the rock and read off the note.

_'YOU ARE FUCKING MINE!'_

"Who's it from?" Tails muttered. Sonic was quiet for a minute, the he chuckled.

"She's still nuts for me huh?." The blue hedgehog finally spoke.

"I guess so..." he muttered."you need help with that window?"

An hour later, they finished with the window and were watching the local news, eating Tyson chicken tenders. "Phew, the first time I did work with my hands besides gaming and wanking off." Sonic remarked. Tails suddenly remembered what they were talking about before the window incident.

"Speaking of that, you should get out of the house more often and do something, like walk around, buy food, rob a bank…er…you know what I'm saying.." The fox spat out. Sonic thought to himself for a moment and looked in the mirror. _God, I look like shit. Maybe He's right. I should get out more. _A sudden grin appeared on Sonic's face. _I know! _"Tails, you're right, and I know just what to do."

"What?"

"PARTY!"

"A party? Oh fuck no, remember what happened the last time we held a party…"

_***FLASHBACK***_

"Hey, hey, look what I have?" A drunken Shadow yelled as he came in through the crowded front door, holding a bag of weed. He set the pot on the table. "Let's smoke this shit." He handed a joint to Sonic. Tails came into the room

"I'm going to get some beer at the liquor store down the street, don't go burn the house down." he said. He grabbed his keys and drove off.

"*cough...who wants a hit?" Sonic asked the people around him.

_**10 minutes later…**_

Sonic and Shadow were standing outside with the Fire department. The house was nothing but a pile of ashes. Everyone who was inside made it out safely and left. The hedgehogs were approached by a really pissed-off Tails, fire in his eyes.

"Sorry about your house…." Sonic said.

_***END OF FLASHBACK***_

"Because of that, I now live in a piece of crap apartment in the poorest part of this city." Tails whined. "And I'm still pissed off at you and Shadow, mainly Shadow 'cause he's the one who brought that shit."

"I didn't say it would be at your place, 'cause it totally smell like shit in there," Sonic reassured him. The fox let out a sigh of relief"That's why It's gonna be here, at my place of comfort of peace and comfort...and zombie killing." Sonic grabbed a beer from the fridge. "I'll be on Friday, so I have two days to prepare for it."

"So you gonna tell everyone about it?" Tails asked.

"No shit sherlock, but I'll do it tomorrow."

"Why not now?"

"'Cause I'm really tired from fixing the damn window that 'someone' broke with a rock."

"Ok, see ya tomorrow."

"Yeah, yeah, see ya douchebag."

After Tails left, Sonic put on a pair of pj's and laid in his bed, listening to his ipod. He then got a phone call. It said Unknown.

"Hello?"

"Friday..." A dark, low pitch voice spoke with a seductive tone.

"Listen, if this is some kind of prank, fuck off." The dial tone came on. "Fuck." He then heard a loud 'WTF' outside. He opened his window up and saw Tails staring at his car. Someone tagged "I'm a doucebag" on it. Sonic fell to the ground laughing his ass off till he fell asleep.

**_Ok, second attempt, I think i did ok. What do you guys think? RATE AND REVIEW PLEASE. CHAPTER 2: PREPARATION coming sooon_**


	2. Chapter 2: Wednesday

**CHAPTER 2: Wednesday: Calls, Best Buy, and The One.**

_12:30PM, Wednesday Morning_

**"**_I stood in the dark, been waiting all this time, while we damn the dead, I'm trying to survive. I'm not ready to die!" _Sonic sang to himself while serving himself a big ass bowl of Wheaties. Today, he wouldn't play any video games because he had a house party to set up before Friday. After he finished his bowl of Wheatie goodness, he sat down on his couch with a phonebook. "Who should I call first? Meh..I'll call Shadow."

_Shadow's House._

"Oh yeah, take those clothes off. Oh yeah, girl, you so fucking HOT!" Shadow moaned at his computer screen. What better way to taking care of morning wood than watching porn when no one was up yet. As he was about to release his kraken when his phone rang. "Motherfucker." he moaned. 'HELLO"

"_Hey Shadow It's Sonic."_

"This better be good, Sonic. Hurry up, my boner's going down,"

"Um...Ok. I'm hosting a party on Friday at my crib and I was wondering if-"

"I'LL BE THERE! BYE." Shadow hung up and looked down at his penis. It became flaccid. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he screamed like Darth Vader from Revenge of the Sith.

"What happened Shady?" A girl's voice asked from the door.

"Uh..NOTHING ROUGE BABY..." Shadow answered as he pulled up his pants and turned off his computer.

_Back to Sonic._

"Ok, that went well. Shadow: Check" Sonic looked who was next on the list. _Silver. _He dialed the number.

_RING, RING, RING._

_Hello?_

"Hey Silv-"

_Who the hell is this?_ Sonic got nervous. _Shit, did i dialed the wrong number? Oh well._

"It's Sonic."

_Sonic, It sounds familiar._

"I was the guy that you tried to assasinate back then in that one city."

_What city?_

"I forgot the name, but they were having some gay ass festival. You don't remember."

_"...Say that again..." _Sonic facepalmed. He remembered one time...

"We went to that Avenged Sevenfold concert and started a fight in a mosh pit..."

_OH! SUP FOOL! I couldn't recognize your voice, It sounded like a child molester. _Sonic thought. '_Do I really sound like that.'_

Silver continued. _Anyway, I'm here with my girl, Blaze. You remember here right? _

'_Well, I can skip her name in the book.' _Sonic thought. "Uh yeah, listen, I throwing a party on Friday and wanted to know if you and Blaze would like to come..." The white hedgehog let out a big ass scream so damn loud, All the babies in the world started crying and shitting themselves.

_YOU BET YOUR ASS I'LL BE THERE, I HAVE TO TELL MY GIRL, BLAZE. I'LL BRING SOME JACK'S AND MIKE'S HARD LEMONADE._

"Uh..Ok see ya then." They hung up.

_AT SILVER'S..._

"HEY BABE, SONIC INVITED US TO HIS HOUSE ON FRIDAY FOR A PARTY."

"That's great Silvy," Blaze replied as she was polishing her nails for the 200th time today. Silver then took off his shoe, getting a piece of paper out of it. He added JACK DANIELS and MIKE'S to a list of stuff to get from Costco.

_BACK TO SONIC_

_"_Silver and Blaze, check." Sonic looked at the next contact in the book: _ASSFACE KNUX._

"Hehe..." Sonic chuckled. He called the number, only hearing the answering machine go on.

_Hey, Knuckles here, I probably out doing shit like drinking or just too damn lazy to pick up this phone. Leave a fucking message...BEEP_

"Mother fucker still doesn't pick up his damn phone." He was about to dial the next number when he notice a analog stick on the floor. "Shit, I forgot about the damn controller. I'll call the rest later. TO BEST BUY!" The blue hedgehog said in a heroic voice. He grabbed his keys and Waking the Fallen CD and drove off to Best Buy.

The Station Square plaza was packed as usual. Hearing drivers throwing a god damn tantrum and beating the shit out of another driver for taking their parking spot was a normal thing here. Yes' there is security, but they don't care. Thankfully, Sonic didn't have to go through all that bullshit and found a spot near the entrance. When he walked up to the opening, he saw some famliar faces. There were three: A crocodile who always asking for a damn computer room. (Shit, there's a Best Buy right there, they have computers) A annoying bee who listens to Justin *cough faggot* Bieber, and a chameleon that's just damn right chill. "Vector, Charmy, Espio?"

"OH SHIT SON! WASSUP SONIC!" Vector yelled.

"SUP MY BLUE NIGGA!" Charmy said

"...Hey dude." Espio calmly greeted.

"What you guys doing here?" The blue hedgehog asked curiously.

"Well Vector here keep on bitching about that damn computer room, so I decided to show him a computer room...In a Best Buy." Espio answered.

"That was no damn computer room, It was just laptops..." Vector retaliated

"DAMMIT VECTOR! Your such a dumbass, LAPTOPS AND COMPUTERS ARE THE SAME SHIT."

"Whatever you say, I stand by what I believe." The croc smirked

"AND I GOT MY LADY GAGA CD! YEAH BOI!" Charmy randomly announced. Sonic gave a 'WTF' expression on his face.

"I came here for a new PS3 controller, Oh and speaking of CD's, did you pick up Avenged Sevenfold's new album?" He asked Espio.

"Yeah, It kicks ass."

"You two and your hard rock crap, ITS'S ALL ABOUT CHRIS BROWN AND LIL' WAYNE YEAH BOI!" Vector spoke. Sonic and Espio responded with punches and kicks to the croc's face and balls. He fell to the ground, moaning in pain.

"Shut up." Espio hissed. Sonic turned to look at a Party City nearby. He remembered the party he was hosting on Friday.

"Hey, If you three are interested, I'm hosting a party on Friday and you guys can come." he asked.

"OK, sounds cool." Espio replied.

"Yeah, We'll go! BEER AND BITCHES FOR EVERYONE!" Charmy said next

Vector, who was able to get back on his feet, nodded.

"Vector, your a DJ right?" Sonic asked.

"Yeah nigga, these headphones aren't for fucking show." The croc stuttered, still hurting from the nut punches.

"Can you bring your equiptment and be the DJ." Sonic said. Vector stood still for a minute, thinking. Then he gave his answer.

"YEAH BOY! I can do dat, I'll be there at 2 to set the shit up." Sonic smiled.

"Thanks dude." Sonic waved bye to the three and went in to the Best Buy.

Sonic was waiting in line for a hour already to pay for his controller (And a _NIGHTMARE _CD) when he was finally called up. "NEXT"

Sonic walked up and handed his shit to the cashier. He looked up at the cashier and gasped. The Cashier simply replied. "Sup Sonic."

"Knux, you work here?"

"Yeah, figured I should try something else other that guarding that damn emerald. That shit was getting boring as fuck, so I filled a application for Best Buy and BAM! I got a cashier." Knuckles said as he scanned the controller.

"I called you earlier and you didn't answer."

"Oh, sorry, I thought it was Tikal."

"Why did you think that?" Sonic asked.

"Nothing that your noisy ass needs to know about." The Red Echidna snorted as he put Sonic's shit in the bag. "That'll be $65.47." Sonic's eyes widen

"Fuck that shit is expensive." Knuckles rolled his eyes.

"What do you fucking expect, This is a Best Buy. not god damn Costco." Sonic pulled out his wallet."Do you guys take debit?"

"Read the sign." Knuckles said. pointing at a sign.

_YES WE TAKE DEBIT CARDS DUMBFUCK..._

"Oh.." Sonic payed for his shit and Knuckles handed him the bag. "Hey, why did you call me earlier?"

Sonic went blank. "Uh..uh what was it?" He thought. To the left there were 2 stoners buying movies about Marijuana.

"Dude, this is great for our party tonight." The first one said.

"I know dude, I wanna bang." The second one said.

"Dude, there's not gonna be chicks."

"Oh..." Sonic overheard the two potheads and it came to him.

"Oh yeah, Knux, I'm having a party down my house on Friday, and was wondering if you want to go?"

"Oh hell yeah, I'll go, I'll bring my bitch Tikal if that's ok." Knuckles replied. Sonic nodded and they fistbump each other. The two had forgot about the other dudes waiting in line as it extended to the back of the store, getting pissed. "I'VE BEEN IN LINE FOR A HOUR ALREADY, HURRY THE FUCK UP." They ignored them and grinned

"Great, see ya soon." Sonic nodded again. He was about to exit out when Knuckles called him back.

"Hey, One more thing I wanted to ask."

"What is it?"

"You have a girlfriend?" Sonic gave him a puzzled look. "Not right now." Knuckles stood there for a minute. "When will you get one?" he asked.

"Knux, don't you have to get back to the register?" Sonic said. The red Echidna turned to a lined of customers who wanted to kick his ass. "Oh yeah, later." Sonic walked to his car, ignoring the noise of someone screaming in the Best Buy when he saw someone in a hood running with a spray can from the direction of his car. He stood there like a idiot for a second, the walked to his car. The car was tagged with 'I LOVE YOU' and 'YOU ARE MINE' on each side. "Son of a Bitch..."

After taking his car to a car wash to get that graffiti off, Sonic drove back home. It was now 9:30PM. He grabbed his phonebook and crossed the names of Vector, Charmy, Espio, and Knuckles of the list. He wasn't gonna call Rouge the Bat because Shadow would eventually bring her, and for sure he wasn't gonna call Big 'cause he's a retard. There was one more in his phonebook he had hoped to miss.

_AMY_

Sonic stared at his phone. _Should I or not? I really don't want to hurt her fellings. _He debated, INVITE THE BITCH or FORGET THE BITCH. "Oh fuck it, I'll invite her." He called her number. Music started playing all of a sudden, and Sonic found himself singing to it "_We've all been Lost for most of this life (Lost for most of this life) but everywhere we turn, more hatred surrounds us... _Wait? where is that coming from?" He realized it was a cell phone ringing from outside. He saw someone moving in the bushes and ran off. Sonic went to his window and stared down the street. The figure disappeared, leaving a heart made out of a stick on his porch. "Hmm... oh well, must've been a damn raccoon. ZOMBIES TIME!" He decided to call Amy tomorrow. In the meantime, he phoned Shadow to get his ass on PSN and play zombies. They were up till midnight when Sonic fell asleep on the couch with the game still on, leading to a GAME OVER and Shadow going apeshit on the town again...

**_Phew...done. It may not be as funny as the last one, but hope you enjoyed this. There were lyrics to two songs in here I'd like to mention. One is in the beginning called "NOT READY TO DIE". The other is in the last paragraph you just read called "LOST", both by my fav. band AVENGED SEVENFOLD. Anyway, CHAPTER 3 in a week._**


	3. Chapter 3: Thursday

**_First, I would like to thank MKSfan14 and PhantoMNiGHT321 for the reviews.._**

**_CHAPTER 3: Thursday: Party HELL, the box, and FINALLY..._**

*Knock knock

Someone was at the door. Sonic got up from the couch. "Ugh...what the fuck happened last night" He moaned. He saw the PS3 still on and the TV changing colors. "Shit." He went to the door and opened it. It was Tails and Knuckles..

"Hey dudes, your up early.? Sonic said, rubbing his eyes.

"Dumbass, its noon." Tails snarled,

"Really?" The blue hedgehog scratched his head. Yep, it was noon. "Oh, silly me." he say in a gay tone. Tails and Knuckles looked at him with a "What the fuck's up with him" face.

"Anyway," they handed him a newspaper."Look at this..." Sonic read it off in his mind. _Let's see here, Stock is down, rebels own a country, baby beats a adult, Guy goes crazy after a game, injuring thousands, sale 50 percent off..._

"Sale on everything at PARTY CITY!" the hedgehog screamed out, waking a baby wolf nearby, shitting its pants.

"Yeah, we figured you would want to-" Tails stopped mid-sentence when Sonic ran to his room, and came back a second later fully dressed with car keys and the NIGHTMARE cd from Best Buy. "-check. it out..." Tails' voice drifted off.

"Well see ya guys later." Sonic walked to his car.

"Uh dude, that's not the only reason we're here..." Knuckles spoke.

"Yeah, can we go with you?" Tails asked.

"Didn't you guys came in a car or something?" Sonic questioned.

"My car broke down yesterday." The Echidna bellowed.

"And my bike got hit by a car..." Tails said.

"Then how the hell did you guys get here?" The hedgehog questioned again.

"WE WALKED" They both spatted. Sonic sighed. "Ok, get in." They both got into his car and sped off to Party City.

After a lot of arguing with another driver that resulted in a brawl between Knuckles and a dog, The three arrived at their FINAL destination (JK) As they exited the car, Knuckles made a comment. "Damn that dog can pull a damn fight."

"Well, he _did _ have a skull tattoo on his shoulder..." Tails remarked.

"Well, Let's go in." Sonic said.

The Party City was a complete mess. It looked like an episode of Hoarders. Supplies everywhere, costumes on the floor, and paper plates shaped like a dick. Sonic had a disgusted look on his face. "Shit, no wonder they're have everything on sale. It's nothing but junk."

"Yeah, reminds me of that one show on A&E..." Knux smirked.

"HOARDERS!" Tails blasted out.

"NO! BRIDEZILLAS!" Sonic and Tails gave him a "WOW YOUR SO FUCKING STUPID" look. They started walking around the junkyard that was PARTY CITY. The only thing that they were able to scavenge was 20 bags of fifty cups. "Uh guys, I'm gonna go to the bathroom." Sonic told Tails and Knuckles. They nodded. Sonic wobbled like a penguin, looking for the men's room. He saw a employee dressed in a yellow and black shirt with black pants and asked.

"Excuse me sir, where is the bathroom." Sonic asked.

"Oh it's under all that shit." He pointed to a mountain of costumes. His finger suddenly released lightning. Sonic jumped, backing away from him. "Oh, sorry.." The man said. Sonic just walked away. He wasn't going to go through the heap of crap just to piss, so he resorted to the next best thing: Piss in the store. Sonic was pissing on the mountain of shit when he heard a ghostly laugh. He turned around to see a a rectangular box with ?'s marks on the top. Sonic walked up to it, thinking it was a prop, and tried to open it. It wouldn't open. "I guess I have to buy it to make it open, LIKE A PSN CARD." Sonic dragged the box to Tails and Knuckles, who were already standing in line. "Guys look what I found..."

"Good" Tails smirked. "A box for your games?"

"No thing 1, A box for the party. You know. a decor!" Sonic retorted.

"Does it open." Knuckles asked.

"I think, but I have to buy it first." Sonic walked up to the cashier and handed him the cups and the box. The cashier gazed at the box, then turned to the hedgehog. "Where did you find this?"

"In the back of the store." The cashier stared at the box for a sec then shrugged. "Oh fuck it It's free."

"REALLY! SWEET." They paid and got out of the store. Tails and Knuckles couldn't help but stare at the box.

"Sonic, something about this box, it just doesn't feel right." Tails whimpered.

"Yeah man, It looks creepy, like my neighbor, old, creepy, and retarded." Knuckles spoke up.

"Don't worry fags, we'll check it out when we get home." Sonic assured.

When they returned to Sonic's place, they set the box in the living room. Sonic, Knux and Tails sat around the box. "Ok, let's see what's inside." Sonic opened the box. A jingle was heard and a light came from inside. A object appeared and shape-shifted for 3 seconds. It stopped. The result: A cold can of Miller Light.

"And you guys thought it was scary." Sonic said. He grabbed the can and drank it.

Knux tried the box and got a 24 ounce can of bud light. "SSSWWWEEETTT!"

Tails tried and got a carton of milk. "Oh what the fuck."The fox kept on trying, getting Orange Juice and lemonade. "COME ON, GIVE ME SOME FUCKING BEER" He tried it and it stopped on a can of budwiser. "ok..." then another carton of milk. Tails mouth dropped. "FUCK THIS SHIT"

Sonic patted the box like if it was a pet. "Looks like we have a new cooler."

"Totally, and it Kicks ASS." Knux yelled.

"It sucks..." Tails muttered.

Hours later after Tails and Knuckles left. Sonic was on the couch, watching Ghost Adventures on Travel Channel. A commercial came on about calling from prison. Sonic remembered something. _Oh shit, I forgot to call Amy. _He grabbed the phone, started the FORGET THE BITCH and INVITE THE BITCH debate again. Again invite the bitch won. Sonic called the number, but the answering machine came on

_Hello_

"Hey Amy-"

_Leave a message._

"Shit, Oh well..."

Meanwhile, at a house not so far away, Amy was sitting by the phone, ignoring any telemarketer calls. The telemarketers would just hang up when her answering machine came on. She was starting to doze off until she heard the answering machine play in its entirety. She place her head closer tho the speaker.

_Hey, it Sonic... _She gasped. _Listen, I called to tell you that I having a party tomorrow and was wondering if you wanted to go. _A smile came over her face. '_Oh. My. Gosh' _She thought. The message continued. _Besides, we haven't seen each other in a while so... _Amy blushed when she heard this. _So...Later. _It ended there. Amy jumped in joy. "Oh Sonic, I'll be there, love." She said to a picture of him he gave her a few years back. She ran to her room and fell asleep, listening to Seize the Day (A7X).

Back at Sonic's, He laid in his bed, rubbing his head. _Why am I feeling this way towards her? It's like... _He dozed off listening to the same song Amy was listening to when she fell asleep. During this time, Shadow kept on calling him, leaving angry voice mails, again having him go completely bonkers again and took it out on a Fresh and Easy market.

_**Rate and Review :) Chapter 4 PARTY HARD PART 1 in a few days**_


	4. Chapter 4: Party Hard Pt 1

**_CHAPTER 4: PARTY HARD PT. 1_**

"Hey,,,,hey buddy get up...GET THE FUCK UP!" Sonic was rolled out of bed by Shadow, who was released from county jail hours ago. Sonic got up and rubbed his eyes. "Shadow, what the hell.."

"Rise and fucking shine bitch, its 11, you should get ready for the party." Shadow said. Sonic paused for a moment, "WTF" written on his face.

"Shadow, why are you here?"

"I wanted to help you." The black hedgehog answered. (That's a lie)

"How the hell did you get in here?"

"You left your door unlocked. I suggest you lock it next time to prevent bed intruders like me..." Sonic gave a disgusted face at Shadow. _OK...That is fucking weird._

"Uh...Ok" The two hedgehogs went to go get the beer out of Shadow's truck. "Hey, i got some weird ass box from Party City yesterday." Sonic said.

"Really now." Shadow said in a sarcastic tone.

"It gives free beer." Sonic said. Shadow droped the 24 pack of Heineken and ran inside the house. "NO FUCKING WAY" He went in the living room to see the majestic box sitting next to the PS3. "LET ME TRY!"

"Shadow-Wait=" Too late the box opened, shapeshifting into many kinds of beer until settling on one. Shadow eagerly waited for his free can to come. A last, the box made its decision and and gave Shadow...

A carton of milk. Shadow dropped his arms that were in the air and a angry face only a mother on bath salt would love appeared. He started throwing a fit like a five year old wanting a new toy at a Wal-Mart, screaming into the morning sky, flipping off every car passing by the street, saying "FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, SUCK MY DICK!" Sonic ran out, trying to restrain Shadow from going commando on the world.

"Shadow, SHADOW, calm the fuck down, here..." Sonic handed him a bottle of vodka. The black hedgehog downed the vodka faster than a corvette going downhill. For reasons unknown, the drink always calms Shadow down. Maybe he drank when he was mad when he was little, we won't know. Anyway, Shadow drank the bottle, took a deep breath, and shook himself. "Ugh.. Thanks dude, you just save a thousand lives." Shadow smirked.

"Uh..ok. I was going to say, that the box doesn't give you the drinks you want. Its.. well, random." Sonic said.

"Like the box in Call of Duty." Shadow said. They both looked at the box. "Not now, lets get the rest of my shit from my truck."

After carrying 6 kegs of beer into the house, Sonic and Shadow sat on the couch, watching MTV. There was a knock on the door. Sonic looked at the clock. It read 2 o'clock. "He's here." "Who?" Shadow grunted. Sonic opened the door. It was Vector with his DJ equipment.

"HEY NIGGA WASSUP." Vector yelled.

"Oh shit, not this wigger" Shadow muttered.

"Sup Vector, got your equipment?" Sonic asked.

"You bet your blue ass I do, Where you want me to put it?"

"Outside in the back..." Sonic led the croc to the back. Shadow, on the other hand, grabbed his phone and called someone.

"Hey, its me, listen, bring your group to my friend's party... I'll send you the address..."

Sonic was helping Vector set up his turntable, which was covered in stickers and shit. It really looked like a a big ass chest than a turntable. Sonic went to the cooler (not the random one) grabbed two beers, and handed one to Vector.

"Thanks nigga..." Vector replied.

"So...wheres your 'possy'" Sonic asked.

"They'll be here soon, they had to pick up something from 7-Eleven,"

"Oh..." Just then, Shadow entered the back area.

"Hey, I'm going to go pick up Rouge, I'll be back in 30.." He said.

"Ok... oh and while you out, pick up some extra extra hot cheetos..." Sonic ordered. Shadow turned around. _Fuck _he thought. "Anything else?" he asked, putting on a fake smile.

"Uh yeah, go to Weinershizle and grab 50 chili dogs, its not a party without my best food in the whole-"

"OK!OK! I get it" Shadow roared, very annoyed. He got in his truck and drove off.

"Man, what the hell was up his ass?" The Croc wondered.

**_MEANWHILE..._**

Amy Rose had just woken up and was heving a bowl of...Wheaties. She kept thinking of what to wear for Sonic's Party. "What should I wear... The same old shit... or..." The hedgehog glanced at a Kohl's ad in today's newspaper. "..something that will get his attention..." She got ready and went to A Kohl's down the street. She walked out 10 minutes later with a shitload of bags and drove off home, blasting rap music.

**_PARTY TIME: 4:00PM_**

Sonic was placing the random cooler box in the backyard when he heard a car pull up and people getting out. Vector got a call from Charmy about Espio's car being stolen, so he had to go pick them up.

"Is-a this the right place?" A guy in a italian accent spoke.

"That's what that fox said us." Another voice spoke.

"...CHICKEN!" A low, pitched voice yelled. Sonic ran back in the house and straight to the front door. He opened it, revealing Mario, Luigi, Snake, King De-De-De, and Kirby.

"Hey, guys, long time, no see." Sonic greeted.

"Yea man, your retarded fox boy told us you were having a party." Snake said.

"He wrote down your address-a" Mario spatted while picking his nose. Sonic looked at them like they were crazy as fuck.

"Wait, wait when did Tails tell you guys this?" Sonic asked.

"Facebook..." Dedede answered

Sonic led them into the back. They talked about their problems, jobs, and chicks. Dedede noticed the box in the corner. "Hey blue boy, what the fuck is this."

"This, my penguin, is a random beer cooler." Sonic announced. Just as the word beer cooler got inside the 4 guests heads, they lined the box and eagerly waited for their free can.

"COME ON MOTHAFUCKA, THIS FUCKER IS THURSTAYYY!" The fat penguin yelled. The box shuffled its items and gave him...

A box of KFC.

"OH SHIT! CHICKEN!" He shredded that shit up like a blender. Sonic looked on in confusion. _What the fuck? It serves food?_

"Hey, you never mention food in there." Kirby smirked. Mario walked to a table with a plate of spaghetti and a bottle of miller light. Luigi had the same shit. Snake had plate of PF Changs and a bottle of whiskey, and Kirby had only a fortune cookie and a small ass carton of O.J. "Hey, what the fuck? why does everyone have better eats than me?." They were all satisfied except for Kirby who kept bitching about his crappy food. Sonic was in the house, getting some chips when the door bell rang. It was Knuckles with his bitch, Tikal.

"Sup Sonic, got some beer here." He held up a 24 pack of corona. "Where should I-"

"What the fuck! You said we were going to a party, not some little shitty ass gathering?" Tikal the bitch interrupted.

"Bitch, can you please stop with your complaints." They started to argue about their problems with each other. Sonic just shrugged and took the box of beer out back. _No wonder why they have problems. _He doesn't know that the two echidnas were gonna have make up sex on his couch.

The blue hedgehog placed the beer in the blue cooler. He then took out a pack of cigarettes and smoked that shit.

30 minutes later, Sonic went inside to freshen up. As he walked into the living room, he noticed Knuckles and Tikal on the couch...naked. WTF appeared on his face. Sonic walked towards the couch and shook his ass up. "Hey, asshole, wake the fuck up."

"Er..what...EEEEP" Knux screamed like a little bitch, which awoken his sleeping fuck buddy.

"babe, what you hollaring for?" She dozed off a couple of seconds later.

"Dude, get you ass off my couch, and put your clothes back on, we have guest here for fuck's sake." Sonic growled. Knuckles put back his clothes on and picked up his naked girlfriend.

"Where can I drop her at?" He asked.

"Guest room upstairs, first door to your right." said Sonic. Knuckles took his sleeping ho upstairs while Sonic brought out cleaning supplies to wipe cum stains off of the couch. After that, a knock was at the door. It was Shadow and Rouge with a shit ton of chili dogs.

"Here they are, faker, 50 fucking chili dogs, like you said, and you prized cheetos." The black hedgehog tossed Sonic the bag. He took out a Dog and stuffed that shit in his mouth. "Say, why do you still call me faker, even though we settled our differences" Sonic asked.

"'Cause I want to." Shadow replied. Rouge slapped him in the head. "OW!"

"Come on Shad baby, be nice." She said. Shadow turned to her then back to Sonic.

"You have any food?" Shadow said. Sonic held up a chili dog. "Not that shit." Shadow growled.

"Outside then, asshole."

"Thanks, shit face. Come on, babe, let eat." Shadow and Rouge left for the back yard. Sonic sat down as another knock was heard. He opened the door, and there standing were Silver and Blaze with bags of whiskey.

"HEY SONIC! GOT SOME SHIT HERE!" Silver yelled. Sonic yawned and took the bags.

"Good, food and stuff is in the back in a box." Sonic greeted.

"Come on Silv, I'm hungry." Blaze complained. Silver nodded.

"Hey, If you don't mind, I invited some more people here." Silver spatted. Sonic froze. _More people?_

"When will they be here?" He nervously asked. Silver looked at his ghetto Mickey mouse watch.

"About now," Sonic looked outside as many cars lined the street of the neighborhood. Sonic gasped at the huge crowd headed for his house.

"Shit, this is going to be a long ass night..."

**_Sorry if I moved too quickly on this one, anyway, CH 5 in the next few days. RATE AND REVIEW :)_**


	5. Chapter 5: Party Hard Pt 2

**_Probably the longest chapter in the story and some random stuff in here._**

**_CHAPTER 4: PARTY HARD PT. 2: Zombies, Realization of Love, and Random stuff_**

**_7:00PM_**

"_Its only just begun..."_

The house of Sonic the Hedgehog was turned in a massive rave party. The backyard was the heart of it. Vector the DJ just got back with Charmy and Espio from 7-eleven and was blasting the music in the yard. The guests were dancing, getting high, drunk, or pissed because the random food box gave them shit (literally). Inside, Sonic was sitting with Tails and Shadow in the living room, having a couple of beers.

"...and that's how I got that stripper pregnant..." Shadow said, telling a story about him and a stripper from Las Vegas. Tails took a whiff of cocaine from the table.

"Cool story bro..." The fox said.

_DING DONG_

"Oh fuck, more assholes. Shadow, get the door.." Sonic said, too lazy to get the hell up. Shadow got up and walked to the door. He looked out the window, grinning. "Yes, they're finally here." He opened the door to reveal 4 random dudes with instruments on them.

"Where should we set up?" One of them asked.

"Here let me show you." Shadow led the dudes to the back. Meanwhile, Sonic and Tails were still on the couch.

"Hey Sonic, where the hell's Knux?" Tails asked as he snorted up more cocaine.

"He should be around here somewhere..." THUMP! The two jumped when the saw Knuckles fell flat on the floor from out of nowhere. "Oh. There he is..."

"Sup fools..." Knuckles muttered as he laid on the floor still.

* * *

><p>Outside, Vector was on the turntable, doing what DJ's do. Shadow entered with his "friends" and stepped onstage.<p>

"Hey Shad nigga, get your black ass off stage." The Croc bellowed.

"Or what wigger?" Shadow said in a evil tone. The black hedgehog pushed Vector's DJ stuff off the stage, stopping the music and the guests dancing to it. "Hey, what the fuck?" One of the guest yelled.

"NOOO! MY SHIT! YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THIS SHIT COST." The croc yelled. Shadow shrugged and pulled out a Glock 18 and pointed it at Vector's head.

"GET. THE FUCK. OFF. THE STAGE." Shadow yelled. Vector, pissing his cholo pants at the time, ran off crying. Shadow grabbed the mic. "Sorry folks, the DJ had to leave because he lost his balls, so here's the replacement. GUYS, KICK THIS SHIT." The 4 guys set their amps and equipment up and immediately started jamming. Surprisingly, they got a better response than Vector. Epsio enters the yard, surprised to hear hard rock instead of rap. "Holy shit" Shadow walked by, grinning at what he did.

"Hey chameleon, your welcome." He said to Espio, who was head-banging. _What the hell does that mean? Oh fuck it._ He continued listening.

* * *

><p>Back inside, Sonic, Tails and Knuckles, who had recovered from his fall, were eating some chicken from the box.<p>

"Wow, that shit serves food, great." Knuckles commented. Snake and Mario entered the room, cuffing their nuts.

"Hey hedgehog, where the fuck's the bathroom? I've been holding this shit in for 6 hours" He bragged.

"Upstairs, to the left." Sonic replied.

"Thanks bro." Mario and Snake both yelled as they ran upstairs.

"Hey, who the hell's that?" Knuckles pointed to Dedede, who was taking a shit on a plant.

"That's just a dumbass penguin." Sonic stated. "Hey De dede, bathroom's upstairs." The penguin gawked and ran upstairs. He bursted into the bathroom where Snake was pissing.

"Hey what the-" He fell to the floor, pants down, screaming at DeDeDe for not knocking on the door.

* * *

><p><em><strong>9:00pm<strong>_

Sonic, Shadow, Tails, and Knuckles were at a table outside, listening to the band play "UNHOLY CONFESSIONS". Silver entered with a another person next to them.

"Hey foos. This is Slair (OC)." Silver announced.

"Sup guys." Slair greeted.

"Hey Slair." The group answered like a AA meeting greeting.

"We're gonna go listen to them up close later." Silver said as he and Slair walked off.

"He looks like a geek." Knuckles said.

"Looks like

"Looks like a badass." Shadow commented.

"Looks average." Sonic said. Shadow went to the box cooler. It gave him a bear flipping him off. "Fucking bear. I'm gonna go to the store. CHAOS CONTROL." He ended up in a abandoned hangar in the middle of nowhere. "What the fuck, This isn't Wal-Mart." He looked around a saw something coming from the ground. It was a zombie. More of them came from the ground. "What the fuck?" The started sprinting after him. "OH SHIT. OH SHIT! OH FUCK!" He ran around a blue machine for a few minutes when lighting struck and hell dogs came out and joined in the chase. "FUCK THIS! CHAOS CONTROL." Shadow was teleported back to the party. He was in utter shock and disbelief. "I gotta lay off the shrooms."

* * *

><p><em><strong>10:00PM<strong>_

Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles were still in the back, talking. The band had just took a break from playing.

"So I say, what the fuck happened to MTV? They went from just being all about music videos to less time on music videos, and more time on stupid reality TV shows." Knuckles complained. Sonic and Tails shook their head in agreement.

"I agree man. Say who the hell is getting on stage." Sonic looked at the stage where a drunk hedgehog grabbed a guitar and said. "I'm gonna play a fucking melody." He starts shredding on the guitar like crazy. Shadow entered and heard the solo from inside. The black hedgehog ran to where Sonic and the rest stood in amazement.

"Ain't that Slair." Tails asked.

"Oh shit, It is!" Sonic yelped.

"Damn, he can play." Knuckles commented.

"Told ya guys he looked like a badass." Shadow said. Rouge appears out of nowhere and stands next to Shadow, who is still observing Slair shredding the shit out of the guitar. After a few seconds Slair passes out on stage.

"Shit, that mother fucker could play." She said. Shadow turned to her. "Right now, I sure want to play with _you._" Shadow said in a seductive tone, wrapping his arm around her waist, slapping her ass.. "Lets go upstairs." The two ran back inside and upstairs to the guest room where Knuckles' girl, Tikal, was still sleeping. "MOVE, BITCH!" Shadow said, dragging the female echidna out of the bed and threw her into the hallway, slamming the door. Surprisingly, she was still out of it.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, The other 3 went back into the house. The doorbell rang again. "Tails, get that." Sonic ordered. The fox opened the door. "Oh hey AMY." Tails said. Loud enough for Sonic to hear him. <em>Oh shit. <em>He thought. He ran back into the living room, grabbed a NY hat and sat down, reading a newspaper. He then took a peak as she walk in. She was wearing short shorts and a tight tee. _Holy shit, puberty been good to her. _He thought.

"Where is he?" Amy was wondering. She was looking about around the whole house. She went upstairs and knocked on one of the guest rooms. "mmph, mmph TAKEN!" The voice from the other room barked (Shadow). Amy sighed and headed back downstairs, not noticing the sleeping Tikal on the floor. During that Sonic was about to make a run to the back when Tails stopped him in the kitchen.

"Hey foo, Amy's looking for ya."

"I know, I know." He said in a "ok now move" voice.

"Aren't you gonna hit that?" Tails asked while grabbing a KFC biscuit. "Damn this shit's good." Sonic tried to come up with a excuse.

"Dude, I'm fucking hungry. We'll talk later."

"50 chili dogs later and you're still hungry?"

"I worked that off by running."

"You didn't do shit today." The fox kept on countering all his excuses. Sonic finally hit his breaking point and pulled off a Shadow.

"MOVE BITCH" He shoved Tails away, elbowing his eye, making it black, and ran out back, just as Amy entered the kitchen.

"What happened here?." She said, looking at Tails. He pulled out a KFC chicken leg.

"Chicken?"

* * *

><p>Outside, Jet the Hawk, who just got there, was installing a new machine because the beers here in his opinion "sucked cow dick."<p>

"Attention!" everyone stopped. "I, Jet the motherfucking Hawk, have installed this new machine that can change you shitty ass beer into a better beer. OBSERVE!" The wannabe Tony Stark grabbed a bottle of Corona and put it into the machine. 5 seconds later, it came out of the machine, now a glass of tequila. "TA FUCKING DA! IT IS NOW TEQUILA." He roared. The party goers thanked him with boos, but they ended up using the machine anyway,

* * *

><p>Knuckles went upstairs to use the bathroom when he notice Tikal on the floor. "What the fuck?" She then finally started to wake up from her deep sleep.<p>

"Hey baby, I had the weirdest dream."

"What?"

"We were doing roleplay and you were a scary man that had burnt skin, a christmas sweater, and a fedora hat. You were chasing me around with this knifed gloves, and then we fucked. Oh god, how the hell did I get this?" She looked at her arm. It had a long cut on it. Knuckles' eyes widened.

"Ok, what the hell were you smoking?"

* * *

><p>Espio was at the box getting food. The box gave him a blue animal.(No not the fucking bear)<p>

"Sonic, what in god's name are you doing in here?"

"Hiding.."

"From who?"

"Over there!" The blue hedgehog pointed at the pink one who just entered the yard.

"Her? What's wrong with- HOT DAMN!" The chameleon instantly got a rise-in-his-levi's.

"That's why.." Sonic solemnly said. "I've always seen Amy as a annoying fan girl with a bad taste in music and clothes. Now, Its like 'Oh shit, I have to tap that now." He stared to where Amy, which was near the stage, enjoying "AFTERLIFE" cover. "Every time I look at her, I get so queasy and...AHHHH!" He gasped at the sight of the bulge in his pants. "See?"

Espio sighed. "My boi, it something called feelings, you have feelings for her. That fucking simple." He stated. "Now if you excuse me, I gonna go put my boner to good use. Can't let it go to waste." He camouflaged into the bushes and wacked his winkie. Sonic stood dumbfounded for a moment. _The fucking chameleon is right, I have to tell her that-_

"ABOUT GOD DAMN TIME I FOUND YOU!." Amy's voice roared behind him.

"EEEP." Sonic rolled into a ball and rolled like a rolly pollie bug back in to the house. Amy sighed and sat on a chair, tearing. As Sonic unwrapped himself, he pounded the door, angry and emotional.

"FUCK ME!" Sonic spatted out loud in the kitchen.

"OK!" A chick said.

"NOT LIKE THAT!" Sonic roared.

* * *

><p>Silver and Blaze were making out in the living room. Just as it looked like they were gonna get their freak on, Charmy bursted into the room, screaming "FIGHT". He had some white powder on his nose, so he was probably wacked out of his mind, or just hyper like a cat. The couple took a peak out of the window. Yep, there was a fight alright. It was between a drunk Storm and a muscular white man with red markings on his left side dressed in greek clothing.<p>

"You...will not see the end of this day." The white man said, pulling out his weapons, which were short blades.

"You... will soon have to shit sideways." Storm bellowed. The two went at it for five minutes, which the white man dominated the drunk the whole entire time. He was about to finish a bloodied mouth Storm off when police arrived.

"OH SHIT! THE POPO!" The white man screamed. He grew wings and flew away, which led to a helicopter chase. The hedgehog and the cat gave a shrug and continued what they were doing.

* * *

><p>Shadow and Rouge finally came out of the guest room, all sweaty and relaxed.<p>

"Wow, you sure know how to make a woman happy." Rouge said. Shadow smiled.

"That's my specialty." He said. They shared a kiss before walking downstairs. As they parted ways to join their friends, Shadow finds a bag of weed on the floor. "SWEET." He heads to the living room to smoke the shit and watch TV. A random guy notices the bag on the table.

"Oh great some has-" He stopped cold of someone cocking a gun. Shadow was sitting behind him, with a M1911 pointed at the guy.

"If you value your live, step away from my grass." He growled. The stoner pissed his pants and wobbled away. The black hedgehog smirked and took a whiff.

"Let me have some of that shit." Silver asked, appearing out of nowhere. Shadow looked at him. He handed Silver his joint.

"Just one hit." He replied. Silver inhaled, then choked. "*cough...That's some good shit there man." The hedgehog remarked.

"I'm hungry now." Shadow bursted out, rubbing his stomach.

"Me too" Silver said. "Let's go to the box."

"Naw, fuck that, lets go to popeyes," They chaos controlled out of a house and into a random area. Nope, no popeyes here. Just a bunch of zombies and dogs standing around like idiots.

"God DAMMIT! Not this shit again." Shadow screamed. Silver screamed like a bitch at the sight of the undead.

"Shadow get us the fuck out of here." The white hedgehog squealed. Shadow started to shake his chaos emerald, but it did nothing.

"Fuck, RUN!" He commanded as they started running in circles with the undead.

* * *

><p>"Ok Sonic, you can do this, you can do this. Just tell her how I feel." Sonic said to himself, eyeing a lonely Amy at a table outside. After moments of hesitation, He walked toward the table. Amy turned to see him walking towards her. She jumped and sat straight. <em>Finally, after all this time. <em>She thought happily.

_Well here it-_ Sonic's thought was interrupted by a coked up Tails.

"HEY SONIC, WANNA SEE A DEAD BODY?" He yelled. _Oh fuck, he's jacked up on coke again._

"Dude not now, I'm going to-"

"GET OVER HERE" The fox screamed and grabbed Sonic by the arm and dragged his ass back inside the house for the "dead body"

When Amy saw Sonic leave her again at a time she thought he was gonna finally admit his love for her, Her face saddened and she slumped in her chair. "WHAT THE FUCK" She screamed, throwing a bottle of beer across the yard, hitting Luigi, who was taking piss in a bush, He was out cold.

_**RATE AND REVIEW :) CH 6 coming in a week, and will probably be the concluding chapter.**_


	6. Chapter 6: PARTY HARD Pt 3

_**Im back! Sorry for not updating this sooner. School has been a real pain in the ass. Plus, l've been working on some new projects to be uploaded in the next coming days. I made this one extra long. **_

_**CHAPTER 6: PARTY HARD PT 3: The Finale and AFTERMATH**_

"Tails, that's just a chao, not a dead body…" Sonic yapped at the coked up fox, angry by the fact that the fox interrupted his moment with Amy earlier. Tails gawked and twitched more than Michael J. Fox as he stared at the chao.

"….OH FUCK! A ZOMBIE!" He screamed and pulled out a CZ75, unloading all of its rounds at the poor little chao. Sonic shrieked and jumped back, his body now covered in chao blood. The party goers turned to see what was going on, shrugged, and continued dancing. Tails let out a sigh of relief. "I SAVE YOU ALL FROM A ZOMBIE APOCOLYPES."

"YOU FUCKING BASTARD, YOU KILLED A LITTLE INNOCENT ANIMAL!" Sonic roared. Fire grew in his eyes. This motherfuckin' fox dragged him here just to see him kill a animal. "YOU HAVE RUIN MY CHANCES WITH HER EARLIER AND NOW YOU REALLY CROSSED THE FUCKING LINE."

"Who-" BAM! Sonic punched the shit out of Tails, knocking him out cold. The blue hedgehog stood there for a minute, staring at the motionless fox. "Bitch.." He muttered.

_**MILLIONS Of MILES AWAY….**_

On the moon, A white hedgehog and a ebony hedgehog were running around a facility on there, being chased by a horde of zombies. The white one was screaming like a bitch and was running for dear life, even though he had a pistol on him. The ebony one, on the other hand, was smart enough to fight back and was shooting them with a HK-21.

"Silver stop being a little pussy and START KILLING SOME MEATSACKS." The ebony one roared at the white one.

"AHHHH GET US OUT OF HERE!" He stopped for a sec. "Hey Shadow, How the hell are we able to breathe on here if there's no oxygen?" Shadow stopped, as well as the zombies.

"I have no fucking idea…." Shadow responded, then started running again from the zombies. The two then came across another teleporter. "HEY POTHEAD! A TELEPORTER." Shadow yelled. As soon as he heard the word "TELEPORTER", Silver dashed to it like a cheetah on cocaine and waited.

"HURRY THE FUCK UP MAN!" He yelled. Shadow jumped in and teleported out of the moon. They were now at the Station Square Plaza, in front of the Best Buy.

"Hehe, Home sweet-" Silver was cut off by Shadow when a portal opened next to them, and out came a bunch of zombies. "" The two ran off in the direction to Sonic's, hoping to lose the zombies along the way.

* * *

><p>In the bathroom, Knuckles was cleaning the blood off of his girlfriend, Tikal, arm while asking her a bunch of questions about her attacker in her dream.<p>

"Tell me again, How did he look like?" He asked her.

"How many times do I have to tell you, all I saw was a burnt face and a Christmas sweater." She blabbered. Knux then knew what to do. _If this sick fuck only appears in dreams, I bet I can catch the motherfucker and give him a piece of my mind. _He wiped the rest of the blood off and went into the guest room.

"Babe, I'm going to get some sleep, wake me up in thirty ok.." Tikal entered the room.

"Why? It's only 10:30"

"I just need some rest from partying.." He lied. He laid on the bed and fell asleep instantly.

* * *

><p>"Where the hell is that croc?" Espio wondered. It's been 3 hours since Vector ran offstage; crying after Shadow busted his DJ set. The chameleon was wondering around the yard when he heard a faint whimper coming from a trash can. <em>Must be a crying hobo. <em>He walked to the can and opened the lid, revealing a crocodile bawling his eyes out.

"Vector?"

"*sniff LEAVE ME ALONE!" The croc yelled.

"Vector, get the fuck out of there. You'll start smelling like cow shit."

"Leave me," Espio sighed and thought of a way to get him out. He kicked the trash can over. Vector slithered out of there, groaning in pain.

"What the fuck dude?"

"Dude, seriously, you have to come back to reality. You'll be able to buy a new one. You have like 100,000 bucks in your BOFA account." The chameleon said. A sudden hit of realization hit the croc's face.

"Oh shit son, your right, I'm gonna go and buy a new set." He slapped Espio on the back, leaving a red mark. "See ya at the apartment." He ran off into the darkness of the night. Espio stood there like an idiot, rubbing his back.

"Damn, fucker fucked up my back."

* * *

><p>Somewhere at a table in the back, Amy was chugging her tenth bottle of Tecate when Mario approached her.<p>

"Damn girl, you can-a really chug that shit." He said.

"Well, when you're turned down a lot by the love of your life twice in one night, you start to fell like complete shit." She said drunkly. The plumber looked down and thought. _Shit, she's so wasted, none of the things she says make any damn sense. _

"I'm sure that person is-a missing out on a great girl." Mario said, trying to comfort her.

"Yeah, he is. I just wish I can—HURLLLLLLL" Amy vomited on the floor, right on Mario's dress shoes.

"HEY! THESE ARE MY GOOD SHOES." He walked away, muttering curse words. Amy planted her head on the table, sobbing.

* * *

><p>Sonic was outside, chugging a bottle of Budweiser. "Ah what's the use? I'll never get to tell her how I actually feel for her."<p>

_Hey man, don't be all in the shits now. Go after her._

"Wait, who the hell is this?"

_This is your conscience, dumbass. _

"Well, what the hell am I supposed to do. I'm too damn shy to go in front of her."

_Think, asshole. What's a better way to let out your feelings for someone._

"A poem?"

_Close._

"Tell someone else about it._"_

_Now, you're cold._

"A song?"

_There ya go. It took your dumbass long._

"Yeah, A SONG! THANKS MAN!" Sonic yelled, freaking out a chick next to him. She slapped him in the face. "BITCH!"

* * *

><p><em><strong>KNUCKLES'S DREAM<strong>_

"Hey! I'm in Hooters!" Knuckles said as he entered a Hooters in the middle of nowhere. He was immediately escorted to a table by a bunch of hot. Big tit chicks. They then gave him a lap dance while he was ordering his food.

"Oh baby don't stop….; I'll have a bucket of buffalo wings." He told the waitress while commenting on the lap dance.

"Ok, would you like a cup of BLOOD with that!" The waitress shouted in a manly voice.

"Wait…What the fu-"Suddenly, all the Hooter girls vanished into thin air and the place went pitch dark. The next thing Knuckles knew, he was strapped into a chair with knives all around him. He heard a laugh echo in the dark room.

"SHOW YOUSELF MOTHERFUCKER! I'LL KICK THE SHIT OUTTA YA!"

"Hmm….getting a little feisty, I see…." The voice said. A figure came out of the shadows. He had burnt skin, wearing a fedora hat, a Christmas sweater, and brown pants.

"Hey, haven't I seen you in a movie?" Knuckles asked. The man laughed.

"In the movies, I'm funny, but in real life, I'm way more serious.." He inched closer to the echidna, holding his arm with the knifed gloves in the air. "Now….Freddy says Time to DIE!" He grabbed Knuckles' neck and-

_BOOM!_

Knuckles awoke to the sound of a drunk chick busting through the door.

"Hey, you two." She said. Knux scratched his head. _You two? _He turned to the left side of the bed, seeing another person get up. It was Freddy from the dream

"Arg….You MOTHERFUCKER!" Freddy yelled viciously, getting into attack position.

"Wanna go? BRING IT BITCH!" Knuckles roared, raising his fists in the air. The both dashed toward each other. Knuckles got the first hit by a cheap shot to Freddy's nuts. Freddy got pissed and kneed the edhidna in the face. He then scratched him in the chest, blood gushing out. Freddy threw Knuckles out a window and teleported to the echidna in the middle of the street. A bunch of people gathered on the sidewalk, beers in hand, watching this whole thing like a boxing pay-per-view, one side cheering for the echidna and the other side cheering for Freddy. Knuckles was on his knees, coughing up blood in the middle of the street as Freddy walked slowly towards him.

"Any last words, Fuckles?"

"GO TO HELL!" Knux roared. Freddy raised his hand high, moving the knived fingers, ready to end this when-

BANG!

A car rammed right into the dream stalker, sending him flying into a tree, killing him instantly. The driver stopped the car, got out and wobbled to the tree. He looked like Shadow, but had baby blue stripes than crimson on his quills. In other words, It was Mephilies.

"Ugh BURP! What the fuck did I hit?" He wondered. It was obvious he was drunk due to the fact he wasn't walking straight and his car reeked of beer. "Holy shit, It's that dude from that one movie!" He yelled at the lifeless body. He pulled out his wallet and placed 10 bucks in to one of the pockets on Freddy, not knowing he was dead, but hey, you tend to do dumb shit when your fucked up. "Here, buy yourself something nice." The drunk alien said as he walked back to his car and sped off.

* * *

><p>At a local Fresh&amp;Easy, Shadow and Silver were seeking shelter, from the zombies, who had lost sight of the two when they entered the market.<p>

"I can't believe they haven't found us yet….." Shadow remarked.

"I can't believe this store is still open." Silver said, referring to the time as it was now midnight.

"Silver, check outside, see if they're out of the area…." Shadow told him.

"Why me?" The white hedgehog whinned.

"Because you're the one with telekenisis, dumbass."

"Ugh..fine" Silver stepped out of the market, looking both ways of the street. It was complete silence.

"Ok, no one's here, Shadow, let's go before-" All of a sudden, lighting struck the ground, revealing a hellhound in all its hell. Silver let out a squeal, dropping his gun.

"SHIT! RUN!" Silver yelled as he ran off screaming like a bitch. Shadow sighed pulled out a Gaili he had got from the moon and shot the hellhound, making it evaporated. Silver stooped and turned to see a pile of dust.

"Gee, thanks man…"

"No problem pussy. Let's get back to Sonic's before the zombies find us." Shadow then felt something vibrate in his pocket. It was his chaos emerald, suddenly alive again after it stopped working when they first got into the mess. "Hey, my emerald's working.."

"Let's just get the fuck out of here, dude." Silver whined.

"Ok, ok, hold you ass. CHAOS CONTROL." They teleported back to Sonic's Backyard.

"Thank god." Silver said, he ran off to a bush to take a mean shit. Shadow just rolled his eyes. He then spotted someone familiar walking up the stage.

* * *

><p>Everyone was gathered outside now. Knuckles had a cast on his arm and Tails held an ice pack on his eye from the punch to the face by Sonic earlier. Amy sobered up and wondered what was going on. On the stage, a blue hedgehog walked up to the microphone, guitar in hand. "Uh….Hehe, hi guys. I just want to play a short version of this song here, and it's dedicated to someone here tonight." His eyes stared into the back where Amy was. "Well here it goes. Start it off guys." The song started off with a country type sound, all clean and whatever. Sonic's voice now entered the mix.<p>

_A Lonely road, crossed another cold stead light, _

_Miles away from those I love, purpose hard to find_

_While I recall all the words you spoke to me _

_Can't help but wish that I was there, back where I'd love to be, oh yeah._

Everyone was singing along to it like if they were in an episode of fucking Barney the retarded Dinosaur. Amy was starting to tear up 'cause she knew that this song was probably meant for her, but was holding them back. Shadow and the guys were cheering (Except for Slair, who is still passed out.)

_Dear God, the only thing I ask of you_

_Is to hold her when I'm not around when I'm much too far away_

_We all need that person who can be true to you _

_But I left her when I found her and now I wished I stayed_

That was It for the Pink Hedgehog, who was crying a river (Literally). She started running through the crowd, trying to get to the stage.

_Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired and I'm missing you again oh no._

Amy finally managed to get up on the stage and faced Sonic as he sang the last line to this short version of this song.

_Once again._

"Amy, I been wanting to say this for so long-" Sonic couldn't finish his sentence as Amy lips pressed into his, pulling him into a passionate kiss. At that moment, everyone clapped and cheered and whistled for the two as they kept on tongue-wrestling in their mouth. After 5 minutes, they let go and stared deeply into each other's eyes.

"I Love you, Amy Rose."

"I love you too, Sonic the Hedgehog." They hugged and walked off-stage, hand in hand as they approached Shadow and the others.

"WOHO SONIC ! NICE MOTHAFUCKA!" A Coked up Charmy yelled.

"About time you two got together." Silver said.

"Ehh…faker, you getting some tonight." Shadow pointed out.

"Fuck you," Sonic said.

"Don't you mean fuck _her..?" _Espio said, grinning. Amy slapped the shit out of the chameleon, knocking him down.

"COCHINO!" She yelled.

_**Well, there ya go. They got together. I'm sorry if it wasn't as funny as the last few chapters. I started having little writer's blocks. I'm not ending it here though. AFTERMATH coming up in a few days. Hopefully. RATE AND REVIEW. **_

_**ONE MORE THING. I DON'T OWN THE SONG "DEAR GOD" nor I don't own a nightmare on elm street. **_


	7. Chapter 7:AFTERMATH

_**OH GOD ABOUT DAMN TIME I FINALLY FINISHED IT.**_

_**I really haven't been on in a while. Too much stuff going on in my personal life. I feel like this is too long of a chapter and kinda dull, but hell, I felt the need to finish it **_

**_So enjoy:)_**

It was 12:30 and everyone was still partying. The gang was in the living room when….

"GUYS! ZOMBIES OUT IN THE FRONT DOOR!" Snake yelled.

"Shut up Snake, " Sonic snapped. He turned to his friends. "Me and Amy will be upstairs. DON'T FUCKING DISTURB!" The two went upstairs and into Sonic's room, placing a Don't Disturb sign on.

_**IN THE ROOM….**_

"You ready for this, Ames."

"You bet your sweet ass."

"Come here then…" Amy jumped onto Sonic and started making out on the bed. Soon, clothes were flying and the sounds of love making were heard.

Meanwhile, the rest listened to the agent's ramblings.

"GUYS! IM FUCKING SERIOUS! LOOK OUTSIDE!" Snake yelled.

"I'll check this out…" Silver volunteered. He went to the front window. With one peek, he went apeshit, screaming random shit. "ZOMBIES! THEY'RE BACK! SHADOW!" Silver then ran to a closet, fearing for dear life.

Shadow gawked and pulled out a M-16. "Time to kill more of these assholes. Snake, come with me." Snake followed Shadow to the front door, armed with a desert eagle.  
>"Let's go kill." Shadow kicked the door opened. To no surprise, the zombies were gathered behind a beat-up van, raping the shit out of it <strong>(AN: I started getting writer's block, so bear with me here) **they were screaming like crazy hyenas taking a mean shit. As soon as the undead laid their eyes on the hedgehog and the human, they tipped over the van and charged towards them. Snake made the first move and jabbed one of the zombies with his knife….

**KABOOM!**

A bright flash of light erupted from nowhere and all the zombies burned to death…again. Shadow and Snake stood dumbfounded

"Wow that worked…" Snake said. Shadow walked back inside for a minute and came out holding two bottles of beer.

"Bud light?" Shadow offered.

"SURE!" Snake grabbed the bottle and chugged it. The hedgehog and the agent went inside and stood next to a closet, talking when the closet swung open; coming out of it was Silver, sweating a storm.

"Are-Are they gone?" He asked shaking like a dildo.

"Yes, they are, now come out of that closet…" Suddenly everyone in that room started laughing hard.

"What, what's so-"Silver looked at the closet he came out of. "Oh FUCK YOU GUYS! I'm STRAIGHT AS FUCK!" He grabbed a beer bottle and threw it at a big crowd of people in the living room, hitting Luigi yet again.

"Let's keep the good times rolling…" Shadow yelled and started dancing like a buffoon on the couch.

* * *

><p><em><strong>8:00AM <strong>_

_BEEP, BEEP, BEEP_

"Oh for fuck's sake" Sonic moaned. He shut off the alarm and lied in his bed. He turned to his right facing the figure next to him. "Mornin'."

"Good morning, Sonikku…" Amy responded sweetly.

"Had a good night's sleep?"

"Oh yeah…." They both shared a passionate kiss. Sonic got up and grabbed a pair of pants.

"I'm going to make some coffee, you want one?" He asked her.

"Sure." She responded.

* * *

><p>The living room was a total wasteland. Beer bottles, cups, paper, even condoms were scattered everywhere. There was a pool of vomit in front of the couch and on it was Shadow, passed out with a beer bottle in hand. On the floor was Silver with a lampshade on his head. Shadow started to wake and moaned.<p>

"Christ, what the hell happened?" He looked around at the messed up living room and then on the floor and Sliver. "Silver, get up…" He kicked the white hedgehog.

"Oh… Fuck my head hurts like hell…" He looked around, taking off the lampshade. "Say…..where's Blaze?" Silver felt something on his back. "What the fuck…." It was a note.

_You passed out, so I left for home_

_BLAZE 3_

"Shit…." He muttered. He turned to Shadow, rubbing his eyes. "Some party huh?"

"If you mean by being chased by zombies in different places, yeah. That was one hell of a party." Shadow stopped and remembered something. "Damn, Rouge must still be here, probably passed out from all that drinking." Silver got up and stretched

"Now if you'll excuse me, I need to piss." He went to a plant and pissed on it. Shadow frowned.

_Ok….._

* * *

><p>"Damn that was one hell of a party….." Sonic remarked as he prepared two cups of coffee. He went to open the fridge to grab milk, but instead got a kitsune with so much powder in his nose, you would've thought he hung out with Tony Montana last night.<p>

"Tails? What are you doing in here?"

"Uh…. My damn head….Why is it so damn cold?" Tails whimpered.

"Because you're in a damn fridge, now get out and grab the milk while you're at it." Sonic ordered. Tails crawled out with the milk, set it on the counter and sat on the floor.

"Dude, My head is spinning right now."

"Yeah, 'cause you were coked up so much last night, you shot a chao." Sonic said.

"….Damn. Where the hell's everybody?"

"They must've left. I think Shadow and Silver are here still and Amy's upstairs…"

"OOOOHHHHH! Did ya get some bed action?" Tails asked with a devilish grin.

"Shut the fuck up. Can you do me a favor and help me clean the house later." Sonic retorted

"Ok then, lemme take some Tylenol for this raging headache….."

Shadow walked into the kitchen. "Mornin' fags, how did you guys wake up?"

"In bed with my new girl, Amy.." Sonic answered.

"….and what about you, fox-boy?" Shadow asked Tails.

"In a fridge…"

"The fuck? How did you- fuck it, have you seen Rouge anywhere?" Shadow asked

"I heard a girl's voice in the backyard, check there…." Sonic said, pointing to the yard.

"Thanks…." Shadow said and went out back.

"I'm going to grab some cola from the box…. Wait." Tails stared at the box, which suddenly appeared in the kitchen. "Sonic, when the hell did you put the mystery cooler in the kitchen?"

Sonic turned around and scratched his head."I have no fucking clue."

"Fuck it." Tails said and opened the box.

_**JINGLE JINGLE JINGLE**_

Out came a carton of milk with a teddy holding a sign saying "Fuck You. You get Milk, short shit."

"OH YOU'RE FUCKING SHITTING ME? FUCK YOU TOO FUCKING BEAR!"

* * *

><p>"God damn that was one hell of a party…" Espio moaned as he got up from the warm grass. The yard was messier than the living room. He got up to hear someone singing from above, He looked up and saw a bat singing to herself, hanging on a tree with a rope on her leg.<p>

"_Hope will fall tonight with broken wings….."_

"Hey, girl!" Espio called out.

"Uh.. what?" she looked around from her view. "How the hell did I get on this tree?"

"You tell me…" Espio pointed out. "The last thing I remembered is talking with some hot chick who blew me right here,,,,"

"Ok. Didn't need to hear that…" She said. Then she heard someone call her name.

"Rouge, are you back there…." She recognized that voice.

"SHADOW! OVER HERE!"she screamed. Shadow entered the backyard.

"Damn, this is a pig's pen here." Shadow remarked.

"I know right." Came a response from Espio. Shadow turned his head.

"Woah, didn't see you there."

"Sorry, I just woke up here with the memory of a girl giving me head last night."

"…..Ok." Shadow looked up at the tree to see his girlfriend. "Baby, how the hell did you get up there?"

"I'VE BEEN ASKING THE SAME FUCKING QUESTION TO MYSELF, NOW GET ME DOWN FUCKHOLE." She screamed.

"Ok. Ok….Damn. Hey chameleon, you have something I can cut her down with?" The ebony hedgehog asked Espio. He pulled out a ninja star.

"That'll do." He threw it to the branch holding the bats, cutting it clean off. Rouge fell and safely floated down. She immediately ran to Shadow and gave him a hug.

"Jesus, It's only been a few hours.." Shadow muttered.

"Sorry, baby…" She told him. "Now let's go. Thanks Espio for getting me out."

"Anytime." The purple chameleon responded. "Now…Where the fuck is Charmy?"

* * *

><p><em><strong>5:00PM….<strong>_

The day went by fast for Sonic. He spent it cleaning the whole house with little help from Tails, who left later because he needed to find more blow, and had breaks, which consisted of Handies or blowies from Amy. Shadow left for Tylenol and Silver went back home to Blaze and his precious pot farm. He sat on the couch, watching Celebrity Apprentice with her when he heard a ruckus coming from the closet in the living room.

"What was that?" Amy asked, frightened.

"I'll go check it." Sonic groaned. He got up and walked to the closet. He opened it…..

_CRASH!_

Out stumbled Charmy Bee, bong in hand; Snake, and a guy in a leather jacket with blonde hair. "Uh…What the hell?"

"Christ, what the fuck happened last night? Where the hell did I get this bong?" Charmy asked himself.

"Ugh damn…..Haven't felt like this since '98." Snake muttered.

"Where the hell am I?" The guy asked.

"Guys, how the hell did you end up In here?"

"All I remember was beating a random guy with a beer bottle." The bee answered.

"I remembered being called here for some reason." The guy said.

"I don't remember jack-shit." Snake said.

"Wait." Sonic looked at the guy with the leather jacket. "Who the hell are you?"

"Leon Kennedy, Agent for the U.S. Government. I remembered being called here by a guy by the name of Silver about zombies."

"Oh. Pothead just left. Said he had to go throw up in a lake." Sonic said. "And I don't know anything about any zombies. Silver probably smoked some weird shit."

"Really?" Leon questioned.

"OH! Zombies you say?" Snake broke in. "I fought some with the black hedgehog, Shadow, and then the all died when I stabbed one. Some creepy bitch yelled KABOOM after that. Then I remembered you (points at Leon) just arrived, saying shit about zombies, and then I handed you a beer."

"So I got drunk?" Leon asked.

"I think, couldn't remember anymore after that."

"Hey…Where the hell are my pants?" Charmy wondered, looking down at his lower part. The other three yelped at his little bee balls.

"Jesus Christ man, FIND YOU FUCKING PANTS. HIDE THAT LITTLE HAIRY MONSTER!" Sonic yelled.

"I wish I didn't see this." Leon mumbled, covering his eyes.

"How long has that Osama beard been growing?" Snake asked.

"Oh, I don't know maybe-

"FIND YOUR FUCKING PANTS NOW!" Sonic and Leon yelled in union.

"Ok, ok. Damn…" Charmy said as he scurried out of the room to find his trousers. Snake reached for his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigars.

"Smoke?" he offered to Sonic and Leon.

* * *

><p>"Well baby, I have to get home." Amy said to Sonic while watching T.V.<p>

"Aw really?" Sonic moaned. "What time is it?"

"Eight." She said.

"Really? That's too early."

"Ha! You're too funny." She giggled. They got up from the couch and went to the door.

"Hey, can you-" Amy stopped mid-sentence when Sonic all of a sudden picked her up Bridal-style and ran to her house in no less than 5 seconds.

"We're here." Sonic announced proudly.

"Damn, didn't let me finished my question." She remarked. The two both stood there, looking deeply into each other's eyes.

_And we have gone through good and bad times_

_But your unconditional love was always on my mind._

_You've been here from the start for me_

_And you love's always been true as can be_

"So, when will we see each other again?" Amy asked, smiling sweetly to Sonic.

"How about Monday?" Sonic said, scratching his head.

"That's too long." She moaned."

"Come on, it's only a day apart." He reassured her.

"…Ok." She said and pulled him into a deep hug. They faced each other and both leaned in for a kiss. They kept this going for a good minute, and then they released themselves.

_I give my heart to you_

_I give my heart 'cause nothing can compare in this world to you_

_Oh…._

"See ya' soon." Sonic said.

"I love you." Amy said.

"Love you too."

* * *

><p>When Sonic got back to his house, He found Shadow on his doorstep.<p>

"Shadow, what is it?" Sonic asked.

"I forgot my fucking phone here." The black hedgehog snarled. "Plus my playstation is getting fixed and I want to play some zombies."

"Ok ok."

As they entered the house, Sonic and Shadow immediately hear a phone ringing. It was coming from the living room.

_LOOK BEHIND WHAT LIES ON THE SURFACE_

_RITUALS TO READ THE SIGNS _

"Irreversal…" Shadow whispered. "That's my phone all right." Sonic went to the room and saw it was coming from the ceiling.

"What the fuck?" There was an outline of a cell phone on the ceiling. "How the hell?"

Shadow stood there dumbstruck."I really don't know how the fuck it got there."

"Fuck it, just get it out." Shadow then jumped into the ceiling, busted a hole into it and got his phone.

"Got it."

Sonic face palmed himself. _There goes $200._

"Now, fire up that PS3 and find a way to kill George."

"Let me piss first." Sonic said and dashed into the bathroom. As he was pulling down his zipper, he noticed his phone on the floor. "How the…" When he turned it on, he had 60 messages.

**Silver-Nice party, gotta host another one soon**

**Mario- Left cuz stupid brother picked a fight with big bird (Dede-dumbass) Cool party tho**

**Blaze-Great party Sonic**

**Snake- tell shadow he owes me $$$ for the dick-suck contest**

_The fuck?_

He found texts from two unknown numbers.

**-Leon here, That Silver guy gave me your number for some odd reason, then again his eyes were bloodshot again. Contact me tho if you do host another one of these things again**

**-hey did you find an ipod. Some jackass fox jacked me last night and I passed out.**

**And this is Slair (**AN: In future stories, he will be called Stephen.)

It went on and on.

Sonic smirked. "I threw one hell of a party."

"OK LET'S GET THIS SHIT STARTED!"

"Shadow, why do you always have to act like this when we're playing zombies?"

"BECAUSE IT'S FUCKING INTENSE. IT'S LIKE HOW COCAINE IS TO TONY MONTANA!"

Sonic sighed as he and Shadow started a game of zombies. As Shadow was screaming at the screen, making dick jokes, Sonic remembered Snake's text.

"Hey Shadow?"

"What?"

"Did you compete in a dick-sucking contest last night?"

"….."

**10 minutes later…..**

"Damn…..ow ow ow. Shouldn't have asked him that." Sonic said to himself as he put icy hot on his neck and back. He wondered back to his living room, which was now a mess due to Shadow raging. He destroyed the PS3 and took off with the controller. Sonic sat on his couch and wondered to himself.

_What a party…_

_**This was, in my opinion, kind of a bitch to write, but now I'm done with it, hopefully you enjoyed this story and look out for my other stories coming sometime in the coming days or so**_

_**P.S: I do not own the song "Warmness on the Soul" By Avenged Sevenfold or "Irreversal" By Killswitch Engage**_

**Peace**_  
><em>


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